The difference between solitude as 'suffering' and solitude as 'rejuvenation' is the quality of self-reflection that one can generate whilst in it...whilst being alone but not lonely.
Being alone enables the world to be silenced and your inner most thoughts to be heard. The distractions of outside influences, the busyness of life, the chaotic and random changes of course become more prominent when we allow ourselves to enjoy being Alone, to enjoy solitude. The relationship between our rejuvenation and our suffering is both as complex and simple as beauty that can be painful.
I often waltz into my Solitude with a hopeful optimism, enjoying the early moments of peace, only to find my own thoughts invade this peaceful relationship, bringing discord and chaos. My peaceful waltz is always there, always present, even when multiple threads of distraction come to the surface to dominate and violate the peace of solitude. My Waltz continues in the background, always there ready and waiting to be allowed back, allowed to come and dance with me again. I find that I ebb and flow like this through my solitude.
This is what I have composed in my new piece of music, called Alone. I am dancing with the peaceful solitude, enjoying its rejuvenation….It is definitely my Waltz, with a gentle melodic start, dancing with an airiness and lightness. But then the chaos moves in, dominating the melody but working alongside it to dominate and control. The waltz is always there, it is just overshadowed by the darkness. You have to work hard to hear it and feel it, but it is there.
Using my favourite instruments of piano, guitars and strings, Alone is a tapestry of interconnected melodies that dance together with both simplicity and complex minimalism that reflects the beauty and hardship of being Alone.
I would love to her your experiences of being Alone (but not lonely). Is this rejuvenation for you, or is it suffering?
Alone is released on all streaming platforms on Friday 29th October.